Tag Archives: LG refrigerator

LG Refrigerator Model LFX31925ST Can Suck My Ass Through a Flaming Straw.

12 Sep

For those who’ve followed Yummy Awesome off and on, you know about my history with appliances. (Remember the bread machine from Hell?)

Well, forget the bread machine; it’s a walk in sugary cake land compared to my LG refrigerator. I don’t even know where to begin.

The King of Awesome and I bought a house four years ago, and we bought a fridge to put in it. So doing the math, that means said fridge is also four years old.

We picked the LG 30.7-cu ft French Door Refrigerator with Single Ice Maker (Stainless Steel) (Model No. LFX31925ST) because of a few reasons:

  • It was attractive.
  • It could hold a metric fuck-ton of food.
  • The water dispenser was funny.
  • It allegedly could make ice like a mother fucker.
  • It had good reviews and my cousin had it (and she loved it).
  • The LED lights looked pretty boss.

We enjoyed the hell out of it for about six months. Then, the never-ending battle began.

First, we heard a knocking sound. After answering the door to no one for the tenth time, we realized it was the fridge. I Googled. I read the manual. I scratched my head. “Unplug it,” everything more-or-less told me. Great; restart it. Hold down CTRL+ALT+DELETE at the same time. Got it.

I left it unplugged for the recommended four hours. Then I powered LG LFX31925ST back up and the knocking immediately commenced. A few days later, we got the IF error code.

Error code? A refrigerator has an error code? Seriously. This was too damn complicated already. Once again, I turned to Google, the manual, and my scalp. “Fuck this,” I probably said aloud a few times. I called Best Buy. After all, they had strongarmed us into a warranty I didn’t want, and I’m so glad they did.

So the repairman came out. He told me that these fridges were notorious for breaking down. Then he proceeded to show me how to repair it myself because, “This isn’t the first time and it won’t be the last.”

Imagine doing this every three months. I don't have to imagine, because I fucking have to do it.

Imagine doing this every three months. I don’t have to imagine, because I fucking have to do it.

We took the entire freezer apart to get to the ice blower fan, essentially. It gets frozen solid. Every three months like clockwork.

Yeti coolers are the shit.

Yeti coolers are the shit.

Was it manageable? Yeah. First world problems and all that. But then other shit started going down:

  1. The large mechanism that slides into some other shitty, plastic part did something stupid, so the door wouldn’t always close. So guests would shut our fridge but not shut our fridge, which resulted in …
  2. A ripped rubber door seal.
  3. No matter what temp the fridge was set at, food sitting directly on the glass shelves or in two of the three produce drawers would freeze. And we’re not talking about some delightful icy crunch. Entire pieces of fruit, meat, even cheese would freeze solid. Did you know cheese could turn into ice? It can. We cannot store food in half of our fridge. (However, I lined all of the shelves in newspaper, which seems to have helped. Plus, I can now read about the local elections from a year ago every morning while I get the orange juice.)
  4. The freezer fan clogs with ice so often, I have to mention it …
  5. … twice.
  6. The water dispensing button is starting to stick.
  7. The ice dispenser clogs on a daily basis. We keep a knife honer nearby to stab into the bin. I repeat, this happens daily.
  8. It gets fingerprinted to hell. I know this is a hazard of being an appliance in a home where the occupants have hands. But I hate this thing and now I’m just searching for more to add to the list.
  9. The water valve that connects the water line to the fridge wore out. So now we don’t even get water or ice until I replace it.

Guys, I don’t write in this blog that often anymore. I have a child and two dogs and I take care of all of them while trying to work for myself. Blogging has fallen to the wayside because life comes first. However, I am so vehemently pissed off about the thousands of hard-earned dollars I wasted on this refrigerator, that I had to document it. We have a second fridge in our house. We got it for free from an apartment complex that was throwing them away. We keep it in the garage as the King’s beer fridge. Dudes, this fridge (I don’t even know the brand) is probably 20 years old (at least), is ugly as sin, and is chugging away like the King does on a can of craft beer.

Meanwhile, the $2,500 heartache mocks me with a frozen water melon, incessant ticking, and dripping water. Our LG LFX31925ST has become an unfunny joke on our social media pages. My Facebook community and my Instagram followers aren’t even surprised when I bitch about my fridge anymore.

My friends love my sadness.

The fridge has a reputation.

I’ve Googled it so much. I actually found a class action lawsuit about it! The saddest part, however, is I found it a day too late to join. And the message boards dedicated to people suffering like me with this same shitty appliance make this situation even bloodier than it already sounds.

Our goal is to get to five years with this fridge. I don’t know if we’re going to make it. I’m replacing parts on it left and right. But they’re just bandaids. It’s a terrible design made with really crappy parts. If I ever meet anyone who’s an engineer or designer of LG appliances, I cannot promise I won’t punch him/her in the face without saying a word first.

Here’s the model number one more time just for Google. LG LFX31925ST French Door Refrigerator.

 

Updates:

February 9: Mother fucker stopped making ice.

My refrigerator and I are assholes.

21 Aug

When I was in college, I was a bit of a sadist. Every day, my evil friends and I would eat lunch near the soft serve machine just because we knew it periodically sprayed people with sugary milk.

 

Well, my jerk tendencies have continued with my new refrigerator.

 

Let me start by saying that this is the first refrigerator I’ve ever owned. And while on the way to Best Buy to get it, I threw self control out of the car window. I purchased the sexiest fridge you can buy (and you know you’re an adult when you think an appliance is sexy), the LG Orgasm (not really what it’s called, obviously). I wanted to lick it. I wanted to fill it with watermelons. I wanted to climb inside of it with a cherry pie and commit sugary, sloppy suicide (and i’d fit inside, too, perhaps with a few pies).

 

It has a tuck-away shelf to accommodate tall items like wine bottles and tiered desserts. It has French doors, which let’s your inner fat kid sing because you must open two doors at once while gazing into the LED lights. Oh my god, and it has LED LIGHTS! Why the fuck do I need LED lights in my fridge? I don’t, but I can never go back to conventional fridge bulbs.

 

But the best part didn’t reveal itself until a week later. The water dispenser. It’s unlike any fridge water dispenser I’ve ever seen.

 

Which means it’s unlike any water dispenser anyone else has seen.

 

Countless friends try to get a glass of water and end up getting sprayed squirt-gun style because they always put their glass in the wrong spot.

 

And I can never quite warn them in time. I’m not really sure how, to tell you the truth.

 

“Put your glass under the thing that looks like a clitoris” only confuses the men.

 

“Hold your glass in front the plate” only gets people to look at me strangely while they spray water all over themselves and the kitchen, resulting in them looking at the fridge and then doing the exact same thing.

 

“Let me show you …” never works, because everyone thinks they know how to pour water. And people are far too impulsive to wait ten seconds for me to warn them anyway.

 

I’ve tried shouting, “Careful, she’s a squirter,” too, but that just makes me look like a bigger pervert then I already am (although, admit it, the sprayer kind of looks like a robot clit).

 

Oh well. Despite me having to keep a towel by the fridge, I always die laughing in my head when my friends stand dumbfounded as water drips all over their hands, their shoes, and my floor.

 

Small price to pay for comedy.

 

Lightly tough the nub near the top. Oh yeah. That's the spot.