You attack pie, you attack me.

6 Jun

Fuck this guy.

This guy is some emo/hipster/sadsack copy editor for Slate.com. Although I’ve never met him (and for his sake, let’s hope I never do), I want to punch him in the gooch.

Because he thinks pie is nasty.

Not just nasty, though. He pretty much thinks it’s the most foul, disgusting, sloppy dessert ever to touch a pan.

Although with his douchey rhetoric, it’s sort of hard to understand what the fuck he’s talking about in the first place.

“Pie’s relative position in the pantheon of dessert cookery has only risen lately, partly because it is apparently invulnerable to alarm about the oversweetening of America.”

The pantheon of dessert cookery? Who writes a sentence like that?  Then he goes on and on about the White House. And I think British history makes an appearance.

Qué? Truthfully, I couldn’t read the whole thing. It drones on for 1,600 plus words. That’s a lot of vitriol for a food. Hell, when I bitched about quinoa or peas (which I loathe), even I kept it under 350 words.

Anyway, haters are going to hate. And I guess I should just use that to my advantage. After all, if this pie-hating prick isn’t going to be eating any tasty, flaky crust anytime soon, that leaves more for me.

He’s still my sworn enemy, though.

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