This is the only time I will use the term “froyo.”

20 Sep

Whoever thought the term  froyo was cute is a total dipshit.

I refuse to call it a word. Because I find it insulting. And I love bastardizing words. But froyo? ‘Tarded.

That aside, the concept of frozen yogurt is fantastic. It’s tasty. It skews to the side of healthy.

Oh, and it’s freaking everywhere.

When did frozen snacks go the way of cheap nail salons? Just the other day, I was ordering a small cup of acai berry yogurt with strawberries piled on top, and some person started filing my toenails.

Alright, not really. But it’s an absolute, indisputable truth that you can’t walk a city block without crossing the doorway of a Pink Berry, an Orange Cup, a Red Mango, and three more color/noun combos hawking frozen yogurt.

And call me crazy, but they’re all the same (except Orange Cup has sliced almonds whereas Pink Berry does not—shame on you, Pink Berry). Granted, they each have a signature flavor (like bullshit) that does something great for your small intestine, but they all push the same product—dispenser-vended, frozen slop with crunched/bashed stuff on top.

Not that revolutionary. Tasty. But not revolutionary.

I remember this yogurt trend was huge back in the 80s. Only TCBY and whatever-the-other-big-one-was-called sold frozen yogurt as if it were ice cream. On a cone. Covered in chocolate. Sprinkled in sugar.

So it’s not the exact same trend. But regardless, there will always be a food fad. A few years back, it was cupcakes. Then it was burritos. Now it’s yogurt. And tomorrow, who knows?

When “froyo” comes back a third time, I’ll embrace it again. Only there’d better be a more palatable name for it.

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2 Responses to “This is the only time I will use the term “froyo.””

  1. Tara September 23, 2010 at 3:07 PM #

    Great topic!

    • Queen of Awesome September 23, 2010 at 8:50 PM #

      Now that you’re a proper reader, we can give you credit for the idea.

      Thanks, Tara, for being so yummy.

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